Ask the inner circle first
A wedding date is not voted on by a hundred and twenty people. Ten to fifteen actually decide it: the two of you, the parents, the witnesses, and whoever is travelling a long way. The rest of the list will follow whatever date comes out.
Asking that inner circle first avoids the opposite situation, where a date already announced runs into the calendar of the one person who should have been asked.
The season first, the Saturdays after
- 1
Choose the season without them
It depends on the venue, the budget and the weather far more than on anyone’s calendar. That one is a decision for two, not a vote.
- 2
Offer four to six Saturdays
Spread across two different months, so that one weekend already taken does not rule everybody out at once.
- 3
Leave a full week
Almost everyone close to you has someone else to check with before answering. Announce the closing date when you send the link.
Reading the table
The Saturdays stay in calendar order. The highlight is what points: green when everyone said yes, amber for the best remaining option.
| Mum | Dad | Ines | Hugo | Zoe | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Sat 6 June | ✓ | ✓ | ✕ | ✓ | ? |
| Sat 13 June | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ |
| Sat 5 Sept | ✓ | ? | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ |
Every appointment that follows
With the date settled, the year fills up with appointments to arrange between three or four people. They are the same polls, only smaller.
- Hour-long appointments (dress fittings, tasting with the caterer, meeting the photographer or the DJ) are arranged with the “Time slot” type, which offers precise hours.
- Whole weekends (the hen or stag do, a trip to see the venue) go through the “Period” type, which covers periods of several days.
- The brunch the morning after is usually decided much later: a plain date poll is enough, and it is shared in exactly the same place as the others.